March 11, 2008 No comments

quotes juno

Here are some quotes from the movie Juno.

Juno: “it all started with a chair”

store clerk: “well if it isn’t macguff the crime dog back for another test?”
Juno:”well i think the one was defective because the plus sign looked a lil like a division symbol so im still not convinced”

Juno: “silencio old man i just drank my weight in sunny d and i gotta go pronto”

store clerk:” you gotta pay for that pee stick when you get back! don’t think its yours cuz you marked it with your urine”

store clerk: “that ain’t no etch e sketch that one doodle that cant be undid home skillet”

Leah:” juno?
Juno: “no its morgan freeman” (basically their whole phone convo)
Juno: ” im gonna go to women now cuz ya know they help women now

Leah: “so what was it like humpin bleeks boney bod?”
Juno: “magnificent!!”

Juno: “all i see is pork swords”

Juno: “they were talking about in health class that pregnancy often leads to an infant”
Bleeker: “typically yea thats what happens when our moms and teachers get pregnant”

Bleeker: “whos idea was it?”

Juno: “can you hold on a sec i’m on my hamburger phone”

Juno: “i’m gonna say its been about 2 months and 4 days since thee sex mind you thats just a guesstimation.”

Bren: “juno did you by any chance barf in my urn?”

Juno’s dad:”liberty bell if you put one more bacon bit on that potato im gonna kick your lil monkey butt”

Suchin: “all babies want to get borned!” **

Juno: “and the receptionist is trying to get me to take these condoms that look like grape suckers”

Juno: “I was thinking something a lil more edgier like, graphic designer mid 30’s with an Asian girlfriend who like dresses awesome and rocks out on the bass guitar but i dnt wanna be to particular” **

Juno: “and i haven’t taken a dump since Wednesday….morning!”

Juno’s dad: “whos the father?”
Juno: “pauley bleeker”
Juno’s dad: i didn’t know he had it in him
Leah: “i know right!”

Bren:”I was hoping she was expelled or into hard drugs”
Juno’s dad: “i’m gonna punch that bleeker kid in the wiener next time i see him”

Vanessa: “sorry to interrupt the jam session”

Vanessa “about how sure are you like 90% sure 80%?”
Juno: i’m about 104% sure i mean if i could have the thing now and hand it over to ya i would but i’m guessing it probably looks a little bit like a sea monkey right now and uh we should wait uhhh until it uh gets a little cuter”

Juno:”all you got in your stomach is taco bell”

Juno: “ya should have gone to china cuz i hear they give away babies like free ipods ya know they pretty much put them in those t shirt guns and shoot them out at sporting events”

Juno:”I’m already pregnant what other shenanigans can i get into”

Juno:”Whoa!! Dream big!”

Juno “are you still gonna think i’m cute when i’m huge?”
Bleeker: “ill always think your cute, i think your beautiful”

Bleeker:”she smells like soup have you ever smelled her and her whole house smells like soup”

Bleeker: “and you were not bored that day b/c there was a lot of stuff on tv and the blair witch project was coming on stars and you like i haven’t seen this since it came out but oh no we should just make out instead and la la la”

Bleeker:” i still have your underwear”
Juno: “i still have you virginity”

Juno:”are you ashamed that we did it? b/c you don’t have to have the evidence under your sweater!” ***
Bleeker:” let me get your bag”
Juno:”whats another 10lbs”

Juno’s dad:”you gotta find someone who loves you for who you are” and when ya find it thats the person worth stickin with”
Juno:” yea i think i found that”
Juno’s dad: “sure you did your ol D a D”

Juno:” i think i’m in love with you”
Bleeker:” you mean as friends?”
Juno:” no i mean for real, cause you like the coolest person ive ever met and you dont even have to try ya know”
Bleeker:” i try really hard actually”

Juno:”i think its cause my hearts start beating really fast every time i see you”
Bleeker:”mine to”
Juno:”thats all i can ask for”

Bleeker:” can we make out now?”
Juno: yea

Juno:”Dad!? i either just peed my pants or
Juno’s dad: or?
Juno:”thunder cats are go!!!!”

Bren:”cause doctors are sadists who like to play god and watch lesser people scream”****